The Cannonball Story

by The Cannonball Story

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Minutes: 28
Songs: 14
Songs that should have shorter titles: 3
Ukulele songs: like 1 and a half
Guitar rock songs: 7 or so
Bad songs: between 2 and 12
Fly-fishing books proofread during the mastering of this album: 3
Tippet: 6X
Ramona Flowers: 7X
Electabuzz: #125
Batting average: 0.120
Kill/Death ratio: 0.442
Founding members of the Cannonball Story who play Spanish guitar better than Hey Isaac's Back: 0



released January 1, 2014

Created by the Cannonball Story
Lead guitar and backing vocals for "Geraniums" by Hey Isaac's Back




The Cannonball Story Harrisburg, Pennsylvania

The Cannonball Story plays ukulele pop. It defines "ukulele" pretty liberally.

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Track Name: With You In Spirits
Things got wrecked
Who'd've thunk
This would be how far we sunk

First you left
Well that stunk
It's OK cuz now I'm drunk

I'll be with you in spirits
One more shot til I can hear you
Just a gin and tonic nearer
I can almost hear you clearly

First you left at full throttle
Now I've got you in a bottle
Track Name: Don't Fall In Love With A Nuclear Engineer
She should've seen it coming from a mile away maybe 3
But now she has a mushroom cloud where her heart used to be

He goes places she'll never go
He knows things she'll never know

She wants to spend a lifetime with that radiating laugh
She wants to share his whole life but he's only sharing half

Don't fall in love with a nuclear engineer
Lots of people die if you mess up their career
Their off doing fission when you want them to be near
Don't fall in love with a nuclear engineer
Track Name: Interlude In E Flat
Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?
Thou art more lovely and more temperate:
Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May,
And summer's lease hath all too short a date:
Sometime too hot the eye of heaven shines,
And often is his gold complexion dimm'd;
And every fair from fair sometime declines,
By chance or nature's changing course untrimm'd;
But thy eternal summer shall not fade
Nor lose possession of that fair thou owest;
Nor shall Death brag thou wander'st in his shade,
When in eternal lines to time thou growest:
So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
So long lives this and this gives life to thee.
Track Name: Jill Sandwich
Talk like an action star
Pretend everything's like I planned it
Crack a joke
You know it's so hard to be candid
But if I lost you
I don't think I could stand it
You were almost
A Jill Sandwich

I feel down everywhere
A prisoner in a mansion
And you're the only one
Who gives me any attention
You're the one
That I just can't abandon
But you were almost
A Jill Sandwich

You're not my wife, but you listen while I'm talkin
My heart was closed but you're the master of unlocking

Oh, what is this? What is this? What is this?
I think of the dad
My daughters miss
Helicopter blades whirr and whisper
That you were almost
A Jill Sandwich

Oh, you were almost
A Jill Sandwich
Track Name: Let The Right One In
I wanna shower for hours til I
Disappear down the drain
I wanna wake up at 6 in the evening
And go to sleep again

I wanna go in a time machine and
Travel back to the past
I wanna create a paradox so
I can never go back

Oh, input losses
Cyclic process
Send the SOS in Morse Code

I wanna go in a hedge maze and then
Never find my way out
I wanna go on a Sunday drive and
Get stuck in a roundabout

I wanna go up the staircase when I've
Only got 50 Stars
I wanna go up the red, red stairs for
Hours and hours
Track Name: One Day It Will Be Hilarious
Son, if you knew time like I do
You'd know there's no way to fight it
Lot's of things I should recall
Don't remind me

I've known my brain for a while
He's a nice chap but he's not perfect
You've gotta write stuff down
To preserve it

Write about your dumb ideas
And one day it will be hilarious
Write about your deepest fear
And one day it will be hilarious
Write about your dream career
And one day it will be hilarious
Write about right now right here
And one day it will be hilarious

I don't know you like you know you you don't know you like you think you do

(I forget the rest)
Track Name: Contagion
Lately I've been noticing
How much the air I breath just hates me
Particles that I can't see
Are waiting to obliterate me

Oxygen and nitrogen
Were once my friends but I don't trust 'em
Keep inside and close the door
And wear a mask is my new custom

Outside there's a party ragin
I'm afraid of the contagion
Track Name: Michael Myers
There's no need to fear disaster
Be paranoid about the things that matter
Corn syrup blood never hurt an actor
Michael Myers is WIlliam Shatner
Track Name: This Is What You Sign Up For When You're Dating David Bowie
I know you're tired of hearing
About these things I'm gonna be wearing
What can I say except I'm sorry
All these costumes they're a part of me

You wanna smash my mirror
Rip my hands outta my hair
I wish I could stick around
But tonight I'm starward bound

This is what you sign up for when you're dating David Bowie

Tell me I'm sexy tell me I'm wild
Tell me I'm a real moonchild
Tell me I'm pretty tell me I'm strange
Tell me my sparkles are perfectly arranged

So don't mind me if I creep in your room
Dressed like that spider you saw while on shrooms
And don't mind me if I litter the Prius
With all sorts of cosmic debris

Track Name: Writing Songs About Girls To Meet Girls To Write Songs About
I'm exhibiting a mixture of aggression and passivity
That often gets mistaken for charming sensitivity
In the songs and movies and of course on the TV
How come this stuff in real life only ends in misery?

You're a liar who treats me wrong
I'll tell you more if you buy the song

I'm exhibiting a mixture of aggression and passivity
That often gets mistaken for charming sensitivity
I'm just being a moper cuz the girls like famous mopers
So watch me Suzy Loo cuz I'm about to cry on Oprah

You're a guy who's treated wrong
Identify and buy the song
You're a guy with a Christ complex
I accept credit or checks
Track Name: Thin Walls
Who's that lady through the wall?
Can she hear me when I talk?
Who's that knocking on my floor?
Better go and lock the door

I can't take it in this town

Who's that crossing 12th and 3rd?
Why's he flipping me the bird?
Who's that lady selling fruit?
I think they're all in cahoots
Track Name: I Am A Baby In My Universe (Daniel Johnston Cover)
(Cover Song)
Track Name: Birthday Boy (Ween Cover)
(Cover song)
Track Name: Geraniums (feat. Hey Isaac's Back)
On the bus it's kinda crowded
People movin people shoutin
It's OK my iPod's louder

Out the window kinda cloudy
Thunderstorms throughout the county
It might rain here but I doubt it
I doubt it

Waiting waiting always waiting
Could be worse
It isn't raining

Raining raining always raining
'Least it's good for
The geraniums